On Friends and Commitment

Today has been a pretty quiet day.  I got up way early and did a load of laundry, then went out to breakfast and hung out with friends.  Not the friends throwing the pool party, mind you.  I decided to skip the pool party.  To be honest, the more I thought about it, the more I realized that those particular "friends" had been out of my life for out of six months and I saw no reason to pull them back into it, even for a nice pool party on a hot day.

I'd love to be in a group like this.

Don't get me wrong, they're not bad people.  However, I had spent some time trying to contact them and get together with them last summer.  And while I certainly appreciate that they were busy, the fact that they didn't even return calls to let me know they were busy left a bit of a bitter taste in my mouth.  So I eventually gave up.

I was a bit surprised when I got the text inviting me over yesterday for that very reason.  So I told them I'd think about it and let them know.  Well, I let them know by not showing up.

In some ways, it was a hard decision for me to make.  I've never been one to just kick friends out of my life, especially at a time like this, when I'm actually trying to expand my circle of friends so that I have someone to hang out with.  So it seems a little counter-intuitive to blow off (insert Beavis and Butthead soundbite here) an invitation to hang with friends.

But the thing is, I also feel like I've been down this road with these friends before.  They suddenly decide they want to have friends over and they send out last-minute invitations.  I go and admittedly have a good time.  I get my hopes up that this is the beginning of getting together more often.  Then I'm disappointed when the radio silence resumes.

I just don't need that.  So I'll let them go and find friends who are more consistent. I'll find people that I can hang with on a regular basis and seem to be interested in putting in their share of the effort.  (Hey, do I sense a theme here?)

On that note, I think I'm going to go to Home Bar tonight and catch some of the drag show.  Management says they'll be serving food outdoors even, so when I need a break from the crowd and the heat, I can run outside for a quick bite.  I just hope I can avoid Snuggly Bear for most of the night.