Meh

So the coffee date did not go quite as expected.  Granted, it wasn't a complete disaster, and the guy seems like a half decent fellow.  I'm hoping that means that we'll become friends and hang out at times.  Perhaps I'll meet some new people -- and new potential mates -- through him.  But as for being a potential mate or even a sex partner, it's a no go.  We both came to that same conclusion.  In fact, I was getting ready to send him an email saying as much an hour or so after I got home, only to find he'd already sent me an email saying much the same thing.

I'm not entirely surprised, and in the grand scheme of things, I had my doubts earlier this weekend.  There were just a few things he said and did over the weekend that came across as subtle (and not so subtle) violations of my personal boundaries.  For example, on Friday night, he originally suggested we  meet Saturday morning.  I explained to him that I had been feeling tired and on the verge of compromising my health and wanted to sleep in on Saturday.  He said he understood, but then he kept bringing it up the rest of Friday evening and even on Saturday.  He'd say little things, like, "I wish we I was meeting you tomorrow, but I understand that you can't."  I felt as if he was cajoling  me, trying to get me to change my mind.  Which left me wondering:  if he was willing to do that before we even met, what would he be like if we got involved?  Add to that a few things he said during the coffee date, and I just felt that his expectations for getting involved with him -- especially since he's not looking for a full-blown romantic relationship at this time -- were a bit unreasonable.

Granted, I am a bit disappointed that he sent me an email saying he didn't think we'd work out sexually.  It's probably a little bit petty of me, but I really wanted to be the one to turn him down.  I guess I just wanted to make it clear that I found things that caused me to find the arrangement discomforting.  Yeah, I suppose I could have still said as much to him (as it is, I just agreed that it's best we simply opt for friendship), but I think that would have come off as sour grapes rather than honest criticism.

Plus, I admit, I'm disappointed.  At first, this guy seemed like a real possibility, and as much as I'm glad I found out I was wrong about it this early in the game, the loss of a possibility is still frustrating.  Especially when I'm not sure when the next possibility will put in an appearance.