I'd like a man who…

…is funny
...is compassionate
...is attentive
...is playful
...is somewhat sexually aggressive
...knows how to be tender when it's more appropriate
...loves animals
...is at least tolerant if not completely supportive of how indulgent I am of Hellcat
...has interests that he cares about
...cares about other people and their problems
...is helpful when it's appropriate
...is a good listener
...has a great sense of humor
...likes to dance
...loves to cuddle
...is a top (obviously)
...is open to new experiences
...enjoys suggesting new experiences
...supports me in my dreams
...encourages me
...enjoys touching

Can I please slow down now?

I spent most of this past week on a business trip to sunny Orlando.  Before you congratulate me, please remember that this was a business trip.  For me, business trips mean spending just about every waking moment either at my hotel or at a customer's site.  (For this trip, those two things were actually on and the same.)  They also mean long hours (awake from 4am until 11pm on Wednesday, 6:30 am until 10:30 pm on Thursday and Friday.)

The one bright side was that I was able to stay an extra night.  I actually got done with work on Friday at around 3pm.  The office had booked my supervisor and I flights back home on Saturday.  He looked up available flights on Friday and decided to head home a day early.  He gave me the option of changing my flights as well or staying the extra night and come home on Saturday.

A single gay guy with a chance to spend an extra night in Orlando?  For me, that was a no-brainer.  (Alas, I was too tired to see if any other gay guys were in the area and interested in meeting up.)  Not that I did much, mind you.  I was pretty tired.  However, I did end up walking to a steakhouse that was just under a mile away from the hotel.  I had a pleasant time and just enjoyed the fact that I could relax and not have to rush around.  After all, those other days, I had enough time to shower when I got up before getting to work (or catching my flight in the case of Wednesday morning).  Then I had a bit of breakfast and lunch while working through the day.  About two hours before bedtime, I would go dinner with the people I was working with, then head back to my room and crawl into bed.  So being able to get dinner by 6 pm on Friday and then heading back to my room to get on my computer and watch a little television was a treat.

Plus, it turned out that I made the right choice.  My supervisor had nothing but problems on the trip home.  In fact, he ended up flying into a neighboring city and then having to take a taxi back home.  (I don't even want to know what the company is going to have to pay for that.)

Me, I had two pleasant flights after a good night's rest and plenty of time to get to the airport.

But I'm still tired.

Get Personal With Me: Risks

Are you a risk taker?  What's your comfort level with taking risks?  What would you consider the riskiest thing you can take.

Note that this week's topic is intentionally vague.  There are many areas of lives in which we can take risks.  We can take risks in our careers, in our relationships, or in our choice of liesure-time activities.

As always honor the Comment Policy when responding to the things other readers choose to share.

Friday Thoughts: Catharsis

If you get the connection between
this guy and the post, you have a
good chance at figuring out
my real identity.

Screaming into a pillow isn't going to change your circumstances.  But some days, it sure helps you feel better.

Life got in the way

Last week was a hectic week which culminated in this weekend both being Easter and an uncle's funeral.

I'll try to be more Colorful in the near future.  In the meantime, warm wishes and attempts to entertain, while not mandatory, will be greatly appreciated.

Get Personal With Me: Warmer Weather

What constitutes "warm" or "cold" weather can be quite subjective and individualized.  What's your concept of "warm" weather?  Is there a particular temperature it has to reach before you go without a jacket?  Put on shorts?  Make Brad's day?  Make Matty's day?

Today's questions are brought to you by Colorful, who's wondering who forgot to remind Demeter that it was the first day of Spring.

Back to writing and trying something new

Tonight, I officially ended my writing break.  And as I intellectually assumed, my fears of stalling proved unfounded.  I managed to crank out over a thousand words, and it was all on the part of the scene that I was concerned about.  I may still add to that scene later, but I wrote far more into it this time around that I thought I'd be able to.  I'm proud of that.

I also decided to try a change of venue today.  Rather than going to Home Bar to eat and write, I ended up going to a nice little bistro near home.  In fact, I'm writing this post from there.  I just decided I didn't want to drive thirty minutes to go to Home Bar.  And to be honest, I just haven't been satisfied with Home Bar on Tuesday during happy hour lately.  I didn't feel like I was meeting new people or even had the opportunity to meet new people.  This place potentially offers me that option, though I may have to work at being a little bit more outgoing and taking the initiative to say hello.

I'm not sure this will become a permanent stop, however.  I'm not entirely sold on the menu, as there aren't many things on it that really appeal to me as described.  To get a diverse number of choices, I'd have to ask them about changing the order (like leaving off stuff I don't really care for).  So I'll have to think about it.  If nothing else, it offers me another option that I can consider on a case-by-case basis.  And my waiter was pretty damn adorable, so that was a plus.

Taking a break and awful movies

Warning:  This post contains spoilers for a movie that is so poorly written that there are not enough letters in the alphabet to give it a sufficiently low ranking.  If you don't want me to spoil the movie for you, then you may want to stop reading htis post when I start talking about it.  But if you want my advice, the movie is spoiled, full stop, and you'd be doing yourself a favor by jut reading what I write about it here and skipping it.

I didn't do any writing (Note: I don't count blogging as writing) last week.  I decided I wanted a break.  I figure I'm over 40,000 words on the novel, I deserve a break.  Plus, I have two more months to get the rough draft done.

Granted, I'm a little nervous about my choice.  Whenever I take a break, I worry that I won't start back up again.  It's pretty silly at this point, as so far, I've always gone back to writing.  Granted, sometimes I've scrapped a current project to start a new one in the process, and I don't want to scrap the novel I'm working on now.  But a week break is just that, and the ideas are still coming to me for this particular project.  That's a good sign.

I may have to quickly finish up my current scene and jump ahead to a new one, however.  I'm just not sure what to do with the current scene.  Well, that's not true, or I'd just scrap it altogether.  I just don't know how to write it right now.  So I'm thinking I may just put in a brief placeholder or barebones skeleton and move on ahead.  After all, I alread know I want to edit this over the summer.  I can add stuff then.  Editing isn't limited to just deleting or revising.

I spent a good bit of time watching stuff on Netflix this weekend.  It was a "badly made movie" weekend in many ways.  It started out when I watched "A Little Bit Zombie," which was a neat idea but poorly executed.  And that ending?  What was up with that?  Did Margaret Weis and Tracy Hickman write the script?

A screen shot from "A Siren in the Dark."  As sensual as
it is, the story about these two characters is horrifyingly
creepy.

But the movie that absolutely disappointed me was "A Siren in the Dark."  To be honest, part of the reason I watched this movie was that Netflix's description of it (Something like "a psychic cop talks to a gay teen about his lover's disappearance and ends up exploring something really hinky") made it sound like a movie that had managed to escape the gay movie ghetto.  In a sense, it had.  Except that about the only thing the movie had going for it (other than a neat premise that was poorly executed then strangled) was that it had a bunch of scenes with young guys being naked with each other.

First of all, the movie was told almost entirely as a flashback, where Danny told Cameron the cop what had already happened.  I admit I don't like that story-telling device.  Flashbacks are meant to relay key pieces of information about the past that is relevant to the story's plotline.  So when Danny finished his story, I was like "finally, we can get to the action moving forward."  Then the closing credits started rolling thirty seconds later and I was like, "What the hell?"

Add to this the fact that the movie kept repeating scenes and not everything was told in order.  It almost felt like someone was trying to pull the whole Memento effect without having any reason to do that in the movie.  No one's perception was messed up by short term memory loss or anything like that.  So in this instance, it made the movie unnecessarily confusing (whereas in Memento, the confusing nature was intentional and necessary to the point the movie was making.)

Then there was the whole fact that they never really explained the purpose or nature of the relationship between the woman (who they kept calling a "girl" despite the fact that she was obviously at least in her thirties) at Harvest and Joshua.  Nor did they really explain the (admittedly hot) scenes with Cameron's brother and the other boy he was talking to via webcam other than to mention that Cameron has a deeply troubled past due to sexual abuse (which was hardly referenced during the rest of the movie, so why even bring it up?).  And how did Danny survive when the woman from Harvest stabbed him?  How did he eventually get home?  Or was his interview with Cameron not real and some sort of psychic thing?

Then you have the bit at the end of the movie where Cameron is giving Ariel a ride home (the scene was actually repeated at the start of the movie).  It turns out that Ariel is actually Joshua simply trying to lure in a straight victim rather than a gay one this time around.  That would have been a cool idea, if the whole movie wasn't a complete waste up until that point.

I'm serious, this isn't a "B" movie.  This isn't even a "Z" movie.  There isn't a letter far enough down any alphabet to describe this movie.  I've seen better stories used as segues between scenes in porn.  In a lot of ways, I think that's what this "story" was, a bunch of very short (30 second or less) sordid scenes of sex and drug use with bits of poorly done "story" strewn around them.

Let's have a happy Friday!

Brad over at 2 Boys In Love wrote a post this morning in which he listed many (I'm assuming it's not an exhaustive list) things that make him happy.  It's a sweet post and I highly recommend that you go read it if you  have not done so already.  Since I could use a bit more happiness today, I've decided to follow Brad's example in the hopes that it'll "bootsrap" a bit of happiness in my own mind.  So here are some things that make me happy:

Pictures of animals being adorable
are another great source of
happiness for me.

• Reading Brad's list. Seriously.  His happiness is just infectious.
• Being told by random people that they remember me, especially if it's for something like "being super friendly."
• Getting a compliment on one of my humorous/naughty tee shirts.
• Finishing up a writing session for my novel and looking at the latest word count.
• Getting a call, message, or note from a friend, showing that they're thinking of me.
• A pleasant walk on a bright, sunny day.
• A pleasant walk on a warm, dark night.
• Spending time with friends.
• Watching small children play and laugh.
• Having an intelligent conversation.
• Learning something new.
• Spending time with a caring, attentive, and skillful lover.  (Would that it happened more often.)
• Being silly with friends.
• Reading a good book.
• Watching a good movie.
• Watching a corny, poorly made movie.

Sensual Sunday: Growing Hardness

Things are getting steamy in today's installment.

Darrel began to move his lips down Liam’s body, gently kissing a trail from the other boys lips, down his neck and to his chest.  Liam placed his hands on his lover’s head, massaging his scalp.  Darrel’s lips and tongue found one of the soft pink nipple’s on Liam’s pale chest and began to tease it.  Liam’s whole body jerked slightly at the sudden jolt of pleasure.  Darrel slowly caressed the other boy’s navel as he teased the tiny pink nub to full hardness.  Liam could only moan his encouragement.

Liam shivered as the hand on his abdomen eased down his body, coming to rest on the fly of his jeans.  He felt his shaft stiffen as Darrel rubbed at it through the material.  Reflexively, Liam spread his legs wider and pushed his crotch harder against the massaging hand.

Thoughts over a latte

So I'm feeling much better than I was on Thursday.  I'm not back to my fully colorful self.  However, if I was to say I was nothing but shades of gray (and not fifty) on Thursday, I'm back to a more balanced palette, but with subdued tones of all the colors.  That's definite progress, and I'm hopeful I'll be back to full technicolor in a couple more days.

One of the things that helped, I think, was getting a lot of sleep on Thursday. I was in bed by 9:45pm and didn't get up until a little after eight on Friday morning.  Well, other than getting up to take care of Hellcat's needs around 5:30.  She was a doll and let me go back to sleep without much fuss after that.

Then Friday night, I decided to run out and work on my novel at the diner.  Friday's not a normal writing night for me, but I felt like both getting out of the house and working on the novel.  That second part was a relief, as I was worried about my malaise interfering with or even sabotaging the efforts of getting this novel done.  (Such feelings of being down have actually shipwrecked a couple such attempts on my part, after all.)

Today, I hung out with friends for a bit. Then I ran over to a coffee shop to enjoy a latte.  I'm sitting here, sipping on said latte as I write this post in fact.  I'm enjoying the music and conversation in the background.  Every now and then, I look up just to see if anyone I know is around.  So far, I haven't spotted anyone.  That's probably just as well.  The only person I can think of that I know hangs out here regularly is Hot Pants, and I'd just as soon not see him, let alone interact.

So the rest, time out of the house, and work on the novel have improved my mood greatly, which is good.  Granted, I still need to figure out what to do about meeting and socializing with other people, but at least I don't feel quite so hopeless about it.  (Yeah, Thursday really was that bad.)  I'm seriously considering abandoning my time at Home Bar, other than the writing I do there on Tuesday night.  I'm not meeting anyone new there right now.  And if I'm being totally honest, I think I'm mainly going there now out of a sense of obligation to a couple of the people who work there.  To be even more honest, I'm allowing myself to question whether that sense of obligation is merited.  I'm leaning toward "no."

Friday Thoughts: The Importance of Intimacy

Some days, there is nothing more rewarding than laying next to someone you care about deeply and enjoying the physical connection as symbolic of the deeper emotional one.

Meh

I think I've been a bit down the last week or so.  We're not talking massive depression or anything too serious.  Just enough to impact my motivation.  I think part of me may just need a day or two off, where I do absolutely nothing.  Except I hate days like that, too.  At the end, I feel like I did absolutely nothing.  So I guess what I really need is a couple days off, followed by a day or two of fun and excitement.  Or maybe the other way around.  At any rate, I feel like I need something of a reboot right now.

In many ways, I wish that it was May already.  I'm planning a trip to Toronto in May.  I'll be there for a weekend.  What's more, I'll be going there to attend a conference, which should be a lot of fun.  I'll get to meet people, both complete strangers and people I've talked ot online for years (but have not yet met in person).  It sounds like just the thing I need right now.  Which is why it's so frustrating that the darn thing is over two months away still.

The meeting people thing is part of what I really need, too.  I feel like I'm stagnating, socially.  Or worse, I'm slippng backward.  I mean, now that Management and his partner are no longer running a restaurant and they're busy in their own lives, I don't talk to them much.  I tend to only go out to Home Bar at particular times, when the crowd is extremely small.  So I'm seeing people, but not making any new connections.  I don't feel that going to Home Bar when it's busier is an option, because the place has two modes operation.  It's either slow with a couple regulars (most whom work there) or it's packed, noisy, and way too chaotic.

I'm considering going back to the one cofee shop more.  I quit going there because I didn't feel I really met anyone there.  That's mainly because most people go there with others and I find it weird intimidating to walk up to a group of people I don't know and break into their conversation or start up one of my own.

That lack of contact, and the resulting feeling that I'm not meeting anyone new and therefore can't expand my social circles (and yes, eventually meet someone I can date and build a relationship with along the way) is something of a motivational drain right now.  So that's another part of why I'm down.

I know I'll break out of this funk soon.  I'll find a way.  But right now, it's just frustrating to me.

Get Personal With Me: Earworms

In your opinion, what is the worst song that ever got stuck in your head?  How did you finally get rid of it?

Sensual Sunday: Shirtless Liam

Today's installment of Sensual Sunday returns us to Liam and Darrel.

The hair's not quite curly enough
to be Liam, but yum!

Darrel slipped a hand under Liam’s shirt, slowly running it over his bare abdomen.  The touch sent such a shiver through Liam’s body that he broke off the kiss.  Darrel grinned and asked, “Ticklish?”

“A little.  And just so worked up.”

Darrel’s smile broadened.  “Good.”  With that, he resumed caressing the other boys abdomen, slipping his other hand under Liam’s shirt as well.  Liam moaned and leaned closer to Darrel, resting his head on the other boys shoulder.

Darrel brought his hands to Liam’s sides and used them to start pushing the other boy’s shirt slowly up his body, exposing Liam’s pasty stomach and chest.  Liam lifted his arms and allowed the other boy to remove his shirt completely.  He sat there feeling somewhat exposed.  Darrel placed his right hand on Liam’s chest and ran his thumb over the left nipple there, then he playfully pushed the shirtless boy backward.  Liam fell back, the futon’s arm pressing into him just below his shoulder blades.

Darrel knelt next to him and began to massage his bare chest while he returned to kissing him deeply.

Liam lay there, giving in to the pleasure his lover’s touch was producing.

Friday Thoughts: Writers and Gods

Writers often create characters who later turn out to be very different than what the writer intended.  In those cases, a writer may find himself faced with a character whose developed nature refuses to do what the writer's plan for the story requires.  At that moment, the writer is faced with the choice to either revise his story plans or force the character to act in ways that ruins the character's integrity, twisting him into something ghastly.

In this way, a writer can come to understand one of the greatest frustrations of the gods, who deal with very much the same problem with the real people they've created.

Get Personal With Me: Comfort Foods

 What are some of your favorite comfort foods?

Scheduling Woes

I'm trying to figure out a writing schedule for this week.  I've been doing so well writing every Tuesday, Saturday, and Sunday that I'm quite proud of myself.  This week, though, I'm not sure that arrangement will work, due to other things going on.

Last night, was out late-ish for a group activity.  It was highly enjoyable, but it means that if I go out to write tonight (as I normally would), I will be out two nights in a row.  As much as it pains me to admit it (because it probably means my age is starting to get to me), it can be tiring and a health drain on me to go out two nights in a row.  Especially when you consider that I already threw of my sleep schedule this weekend and I'm just now recovering from that.  I'll probably still write tonight, as I currently feel up to the task and I'm not sure I want to find or make time tomorrow or Thursday to do it.

Saturday is the other issue.  Saturday is the first Saturday of the month, which means that Manly Bar will be having its monthly bear event.  I want to go to that.  This means that I either need to do my writing after I go to Manly Bar or reschedule.  I'll probably go to the diner when I leave the bar anyway, so writing that late at night isn't a huge issue.  The bigger issue is that I don't want to leave my laptop in my car during the freezing winter (especially since I'm going to want to use it as soon as I take it in someplace warm, which is not a good idea), nor do I want to lug the laptop around with me inside the bar.  I suppose I could run home after getting done at the bar, grab the laptop, and go back to the diner.  However, that puts me out of my way.  Plus, once I'm home, I'm not sure I'll want to leave again.  So most likely, I will reschedule my Saturday night writing, possibly either to Friday at the diner (oh dear, that'd make two late nights out again) or at a coffee shop on Saturday afternoon.

Fortunately, Sunday night is still golden, so I don't have to worry about rescheduling that writing day.

Of course, I could always skip a writing day altogether, but I'm trying to avoid that.  I have some momentum going and I'd like to keep it up.

Blog Note

Posts are going to be a bit sporadic this week.  Between throwing my sleep schedule out of whack (will I ever learn?) and having a somewhat busy schedule, it's going to be difficult for me to find the time and energy I need to write, let alone manage to have both at the same time.

In the meantime, if you've never seen it before, I highly recommend you check out the 2001 movie "Friends and Family."  It's available for streaming via Netflix.  I watched it this weekend and thought it was hilarious.  Tony Lo Bianco plays a rather convincing Mafia Don, giving the part an air of understated authority and dignity.  Also, the way that the movie plays with stereotypes (imagine a group of stereotypical "Wise Guys" learning to "queen it up") is actually humorous, something I find rare these days.  I have no idea how this movie came out in 2001 and I only discovered it in 2013.

Crazy cats, rest, and writing.

Hello!  I'm back!  Zombies didn't really get my brain.  Hellcat was just having a bit of fun there.  Or at least I was having fun, pretending to be Hellcat.  Though I still haven't figured out where this email receipt for a "Tuna of the month" subscription came from.

Not Hellcat, but I sure
recognize that look.

I was pretty tired last Thursday night, seeing as I was out late (being incorrigible, no less) and then had to get up extra early for an early meeting at work Thursday morning.  (I actually got excused from that meeting, so I actually gave up that hour or so of extra sleep for nothing, but oh well.) So I simply was too tired to write a blog post Thursday night.  Then I had a busy day at work at work.  By the time I found time in the afternoon, I just wasn't in the mood to try and be all philosophical.  From there, the post by Hellcat came into existence.

Speaking of Hellcat, she's the reason I'm tired today.  Well, part of the reason, at least.  The other  part of the reason is that I stayed up late last night.  When I finally decided to go to bed, Hellcat decided it was playtime.  Now here's the thing about Hellcat:  She has to be near me most of the time I'm home.  That means that if she decides that despite that fact that their six other rooms and a basement she could play in after I've gone to bed, she finds it necessary to rare and tear through my sleeping area.

Last night, it was bad enough that I decided that my best bet was to get out of bed, find her string, and play with her.  It tends to tire her out and calm her down more quickly.  So at sometime after two in the morning, i was standing in my upstairs hallway, dangling a bit of string for my murderous little muffin.  Is there any greater evidence of just how much I love her.  (Granted, my love for her didn't keep me from cussing her out.)

As such, I've been taking it easy again today, which is why this post is so late.  The good news is that I think I've gotten enough naps under my belt that I can go to the diner later tonight and work on my novel.  I certainly hope so.  I want to get one thousands words written tonight and another thousand tomorrow.  If I do, this will make a week when I got four thousand words written total.  To me, that's a great accomplishment.

No Thought this Friday

Hello, all.  This is Hellcat.  I'm writing to tell you that Colorful will not be posting a Friday Thought today as he has no thoughts.  You see, the zombies got to him last night and ate his brain.

You know, I thought that it would be strange having human caretaker that no longer has a brain.  But now, I realize that I barely notice a difference.  Of course, he doesn't seem to understand how to open cans of cat food, which is why I will be going on a zombie killing rampage in the near future.  (I wonder if zombie flesh makes for good eating.)

Have a good weekend.

A pleasant evening with a nice guy

Note:  This post, while not explicit, will discuss my recent sex life.  There's a reason I included the parenthetical portion of my blog title, folks!

Yesterday, I was really craving physical affection and intimacy.  So I put out an ad asking any interested guys to invite me over "for a movie and a cuddle."  It wasn't that sex was off the table.  I just wanted to make it clear it wasn't my primary goal and that I really was looking for physical contact more than anything.

A guy replied, indicating he was in town for the night and invited me to come have a drink with him at the bar in his hotel and see where things went.  I agreed and threw on some shoes and headed out the door.  I figured it was worth a shot.  Besides, he had made it clear that he was buying the drinks.

This is an awesome experience.

That's actually a pretty big thing for me.  In the past, I've usually ended up paying for drinks and dinners when I go out with a guy.  (This is mainly because Colorful has had horrible taste in men in the past.)  So it was pleasant to have the other guy treat me for a change.  Since he was paying, he did insist I try Grey Goose vodka in my cocktail.  I agreed, as I'm really not picky about my vodka's when it comes to cocktails (now rum is a different matter!).  It turned out to be quite pleasant.

We sat in the lounge area enjoying our drinks and chatting.  The guy was about five to seven years ago and pretty interesting.  I was also amazed at how he seems to have a pretty sophisticated job that has him doing a lot of things that I tend to associate with sophisticated businessmen (and he was one), and yet he was incredibly down to earth and had a wicked sense of humor.  His take on wine tastings ("The whole reason people normally go to a wine tasting is to get plastered") go me laughing.

After a while, we decided to take our drinks back up to his room.  There, he gave me another surprise.  He asked me if I wanted to take a shower and indicated he needed to take one himself and that I could join him.  Now, I happen to like showering with someone else.  I think it's highly intimate.  As such, I agreed.  So he got the water ready and adjusted the temperature, then we both stripped down and climbed in together.  He ended up washing each other.  Like I said, intimate.  It was possibly the longest shower I've ever taken.

Afterward, we toweled off and got into bed where we spent a great deal of time exploring each other's bodies.  We only focused on body contact and oral (me giving, of course).  I found him to be an incredibly attentive partner.  I've been with a lot of guys who, once they find out I'm pretty much an exclusive bottom, will let me do all the work and barely touch me.  not this guy.  He made sure that I enjoyed myself.  In fact, he had me moaning and had me wishing we were prepared to do more by the time we were done.

Afterward, I finished my drink and we talked a bit.  He asked if I'd mind if he contacted me the next time he was in town.  I told him I'd like that very much, so long as I'm available.  (Hey, he wasn't good enough that I'm not going to look for something more regular/permanent!)

We eventually said our goodbyes.  I went home quite satisfied.  It had been a long time since I had done anything so pleasant and pleasurable.

Get Personal With Me: First Crush

Don't ask who Mikey is.
I...made the name up.
Yeah, that's it.

Today's installment of Get Personal With Me is a holdover from Valentine's Day.  Tell me about your first crush.  Who were they?  How did you know them?  Did they ever find out?  Did anyone else?  How did you feel around them?  How did they act around them?  If they found out, how did they respond?

Note:  Please keep the comment policy firmly in mind for this discussion.  Do not criticize what other people choose to share or put them down because of it.

Thoughts on "Latter Days."

Note:  This blog posts contains spoilers for the movie under discussion.

Yesterday, I pulled out my DVD copy of Latter Days and watched it again.  I love that movie, and it seems like every time I watch it, I notice something new.  One of the things I noticed this time was when Keith (the guy Christian brought food to) grabbed Christian's arm and said all he saw was snow.  During that scene, Keith interpreted it as snow on a blank television screen.  However, I couldn't help to think of the upcoming scene outside the Salt Lake City Airport.  After all, it was snowing in that scene (and was a key point of the dialogue) and that scene was an extremely pivotal moment in Christian's (and Aaron's) life.  I don't know if the writers intended for me to make that connection, but I found it an interesting one to make, all the same.

See?  Snow!  Keith was right!

I also noticed how good some of the non-verbal acting was, this time.  Like Aaron's mother's body language and facial expressions after Christian returns the pocket watch.  She expressed so much emotion without uttering a word in those few seconds.  Or the expression on Lila's face when Aaron mentions his "brief but disastrous affair (encounter?) with a sharp object.  She communicate that perfect sense of suddenly being sure how to respond to such a revelation.  (Of course, I also like her "he's a great tipper" explanation to the two patrons who witness Christian's and Aaron's reunion.)

Of course, there's the one part of the movie that always troubles me when I see it.  It's Christians story about being rescued in the snowstorm.  I understand the scene and I know it's not meant to imply anything untoward or encourage people to infer the worst.  However, it still troubles me and in many ways wish the writers had left it out or at least done something different (not sure exactly what) with it.

Of course, given my own religious upbringing -- which was admittedly not nearly as strict as Aaron's portrayed (or many other guys' real) experiences -- let's me identify a great deal with the movie.  I get that religious tension.  I get -- though not to the severity displayed -- the idea of "giving up so much" to be with someone you love because your family and closest community considers that love to be a sham or even demonic.  I suppose that's why I cry whenever I watch the movie.

That and it's just a total emotional roller coaster of a story with an awesome ending.

And on President's Day, he rested.

This has been a pleasant, but busy weekend.  Well, it was mainly just yesterday that was busy.  Sassy Waiter (who is no longer a waiter, since there's no longer a dining room) was organizing a big fundraising event at Home Bar yesterday.  He convinced me to go and check it out.  I had only planned on going for a little over an hour, but I think I ended up spending two hours there.  It was fun.  There was some great music, games, and plenty of good looking guys to check out.  Alas, most of them were taken.  None of them certainly showed any interest in me.

Later (much later) in the evening, I did my weekly writing session at Applebee's.  I love it there and I've actually picked up (not in that sense) a regular server there.  She's a sweetheart and she let's me take up a table for a couple hours.  Plus she puts up with my smartass nature, which is always a plus.

Plus I did my grocery shopping yesterday, which was somewhat frustrating.  Every week, I buy a couple ready-made salads in sealed containers.  I take them to work for lunch a couple times each week.  My regular grocery store was out of them.  (Someone was restocking that section of the store, so he might have been putting more out.  But I was unwilling to stand around and wait.)  So after dinner, I stopped at a different store to pick them up.  That store didn't have any either!  How am i supposed to eat healthy(-ish) when my local stores won't keep my salads in stock?  (Insert melodramatic "woe is me" here.)

Today, I plan on just taking it easy.  I figure I'll watch a couple movies.  Latter Days has been on my mind for a bit, so today may be the day I pull out that DVD.

Granted, I'd love some company right about now. Alas, that doesn't look likely.  As I said, none of the cute guys at the fundraiser gave me a second look.

Sensual Sunday: Post-Movie Affection

Today's installment of Sensual Sunday finds Liam and Darrel just getting done with their movie.

Still not them, but do you care?

Liam blinked his eyes when the movie finally ended.  His neck ached from being bent for so long, his head rested on Darrel’s shoulder.  He felt like he should try to work out the knot that must have surely formed, but he didn’t want to move.  The other boy squeezed his thigh and said, “So what did you think of the movie?”

“It was pretty good,” Liam admitted.  “I think I missed some of it, as I almost fell asleep a couple of times.”

Darrel lifted his hand from Liam’s thigh and tossled the boy’s curls.  “I thought I heard you snoring at one point.”

Liam loved it when his lover played with his hair like that.  The feeling of the other boy’s hands against his scalp was soothing and intimate.  A soft, breathy moan escaped his lips.  “It’s possible,” he admitted.

Darrel slid his hand to Liam’s left temple, where his thumb began to toy with the light-skinned boy’s earlobe.  Liam shivered with delight.  Darrel reached over with his other hand and stroke Liam’s knee.  “So, about your little problem...”

Liam turned his head and kissed Darrel’s cheek, trying to ignore his protesting neck.  “Well, it had gone away.  But if you keep doing what you’re doing, it’s going to come back pretty quickly.”

Darrel grinned.  “Well, in that case.”  He moved his hand up to Liam’s mid-thigh and initiated a kiss on the other boy’s lips.  Liam’s body responded and place his left hand on his lover’s chest, feeling the other boys pectoral muscles.  He felt the tip of Darrel’s tongue flick across his lips.  He parted them and moaned softly as the small wet invader darted into his mouth.

I love the feel of shea butter.

Leaves my skin feeling
clean and silky.

This morning, I hopped into the shower and decided to use my SoftSoap body wash with shea butter and almond oil.  I use it every now and then, especially on those days where I want to have an extra special shower experience.  (No, no orgasms were involved).  I just love the feel of it against my skin.  It's nice and silky, as opposed to my other body wash.

As I was showering today, I realized there's another reason I love the feel of that body wash and why it gives me an extra special feeling.  I realized that, at least on an unconscious level, it stirred memories I also associate with shea butter because of another product I favor that has the same ingredient (come to think of it, the textures of the two products are pretty close as a result):  The water based version of Boy Butter lubricant.

I switched to Boy Butter a few years back when one of my boyfriends (Sodomy Badge, to be precise) had a bad reaction to the only lube I had on hand at the time.  (At least, we assume it was a bad reaction to the lube.)  I noticed that the lube had one of the nonoxyl compounds (though not nonoxyl-9) in it.  (Which is kind of weird, because nonoxyl compounds are normally used for spermicidal purposes, which seems pretty pointless in a lubricant that's specifically packaged and marketed for use in anal sex, as this lube was.)  A web search informed me that these compounds can irritate sensitive skin.

Makes other parts of my body feel the same
way.  Parts the body wash doesn't really get
to.  And maybe not the "clean" part so much.

As a result, I went looking for different lubes.  During my search, I ran across boy-butter, which claims to be hypoallergenic and has a rich creamy feeling.  I can't speak to the former, but I can say from personal experience that I completely agree with that second assessment.  In fact, I've pretty much started using Boy Butter exclusively.  I've tried Wet, Astroglide, KY, and a few less-known brands.  One thing I find with all of them is that they have a somewhat tacky texture to them, which only gets worse as they start to dry.  By butter, on the other hand feels creamy, silky, and soothing to me and continues to feel that way even as it starts to dry.  (In fact, it's the only lube I don't feel like I have to wash off immediately after the fun is over.)

So when I wash with that body wash, I think of the good feelings that I associate with my favorite lubricant, and possibly even what I'm doing while using that lubricant.  So it's no wonder I feel extra special and extra good about myself when I use it.

Note:  I am not being paid by the manufacturers of either product mentioned in this ad.  Though if they happen to see this and feel like compensating me for my endorsements, I would not be opposed to the idea.  (Hey, a guy can dream, right?)

Friday Thoughts: Self-knowledge

In order to attract others, it is best to present your best to them.  In order to present your best to them, you have to first know yourself.

Valentine's Day for the Single Guy

So today is Valentine's Day.  I've decided that I'm going to do my best and celebrate it.  I'm gong to even enjoy it.  It's not going to be easy, as I'm single and it seems like everyone everywhere is telling me (and everyone else) that this is a holiday for couples.  Truth be told, I'd rather be celebrating it with someone special.  But since I don't have someone special at the moment, that's not an option.  So my choices are to not celebrate it or celebrate it alone.  I'm choosing that second option.

This is how I'm wearing red today.  I
don't look as sexy as the model, though.

I've never really hated Valentine's Day because I'm single, like some single seem to.  Yeah, I've been sad about being single when the holiday rolls around -- I think I've been single for more than seven eighths of the years I've been around for them^[1].  But my singleness is not the day's fault.  Besides, I don't see how being a Debbie Downer or Bitter Betty is going change my singleness, though I can certainly see how it could prolong it.

But I haven't really celebrated and enjoyed the holiday in the past.  I've decided that's going to change this year.  After all, Valentine's Day is about love, and I have a great deal of passion and respect for love.  I also have a great capacity for love, and that in itself deserves to be celebrated and cherished.  I don't know what I'll do to celebrate.  Maybe I'll just get a special bottle of wine and have a couple glasses at home after work.  Maybe I'll watch one of the relationship-oriented movies that I adore.  Maybe I'll do something else.  I have all day to decide.  But I am hereby committing to doing something to celebrate the great ideal of love and my capacity to share love.  And maybe I'll offer up a prayer to cupid that he help me find someone in the coming months that I can share that love with next February.

Happy Valentine's Day, dear readers.

^[1]What's more frustrating is that during the years when I haven't been single, circumstances usually prevented me from spending Valentine's Day with my boyfriend at the time, anyway.

Get Personal With Me: Romance

In honor of the fact that tomorrow is Valentine's Day, let's talk romance.  What is your idea of a (or "the perfect") romantic date?

As always, please remember the comment policy and don't criticize other people's thoughts on the topic.

Colorful offers dating advice. Reader beware.

The other day, I got looking through my blog's stats.  I found that one person ended up finding me through the following search query:

how to respond personal ad for dating site

Now as a flamboyantly gay man with some experience doing the personal ads thing and a love for offering advice in a strongly opinionated way, I just had to write a post about this.  After all, I know how I want to have guys respond to my personal ads.  And while I won't presume that everyone else in the world is a lot like my, I think my views make a lot of sense and aren't on the fringes of extremism, either.  So here are a few points I'd like to offer:

Read the ad.  Read it twice.  Really think about what it says.  In all seriousness, I am amazed by the number of guys who respond to one of my ads in a way that leaves me wondering if they even read what I wrote.  I've had guys tell me all about how they want me to do things to them that should be pretty clear from my ad I'm not into (mainly because they're describing things that I want done to me).  Or I've had guys contact me and immediately start talking to me about getting our freak on when I've spent the whole ad talking about romance and getting to know someone without once mentioning sex.

Interact with the ad as part of the response.  This point is, at least in my mind, a natural consequence of the previous point.  If an ad talks about hobbies, movies, or any other topic, find a way to talk about one of the topics mentioned.  For example, "I saw that you love horror movies.  Are you more into classic one's like 'Nightmare on Elm Street,' or do you like the recent gore-fests like 'Hostel'?"  Another good one would be, "You're a hiker.  Have you ever hiked Portage Trail?  My one college buddy and I used to do it about once a month once the weather got about fifty."  This demonstrates that you not only took the time to read the ad, but that you found something about it worth talking about.  Plus it shows you're interested in the person who wrote the ad and their interests.

Show interest in the person, not the body.  Don't get me wrong.  Everyone likes to be told they're attractive, and there's nothing wrong with telling someone that you like their picture or that you think they're cute (or even sexy).  But here's my perspective:  If you tell me that once, it's a compliment.  If you tell me so a second time (in the same message), I'm going to assume you're flattering me to get something out of me.  If you tell me it a third time, then I'm going to assume that you're like a cartoon character and you're currently envisioning me as a juicy piece of meet rather than a person.  Oh, and if all you can say about me is that I'm attractive, I'm going to make that last assumption even if you only say it once.

Don't forget to talk about yourself.  Here's the thing:  If you're responding to a personal ad, that ad is written by the other person.  That means they've (hopefully) put some effort into talking about themselves and putting themselves out there.  In your response, you need to return the favor.  One of the most offensive (in my opinion at least) responses I received to the ad I shared in this post was a single sentence:  "I want to know more about you."  I put a lot of time and effort into writing that ad and I felt it was very revealing.  And the other dude couldn't even be bothered to tell me as something as simple as his name.  That's some real bullshit.

And don't make the mistake of conflating "talking about yourself" with "telling them what you hope to get out of them (or anyone else)."^[1]  This is your chance to share your interests, the things that make you interesting (and if you're not sure what makes you interesting, then you need to do some soul searching before you respond to too many personal ads), and what you have to offer the other person.  So talk yourself up without being a total conceited jerk (and there's a lot you can say that falls into the former category without running into the latter one).  Be charming and captivating.  Try to build common ground which will lead to common interest.

Those are my main recommendations based on some of the replies I've received over the past couple years.  I'd be interested to hear what advice or tips my readers might add.

---

^[1]On the flip side to this, I actually recommend avoiding personal ads that are nothing more than a shopping list of what the other person is looking for.  Dating is about both person's needs and what they both bring to the table.  In my experience, I person who writes a personal ad that doesn't offer any insight to that second part does not understand this and will end up being way too needy.

Writer Talk

Saturday night, I decided to skip going out to any of the bars.  I decided that I would much rather just go straight to the diner I usually go to afterward.  That way, I could take my laptop and work on my writing.  I've often sat there after spending an hour or so at the bar and thinking that it would be good writing time.  Quite frankly, though, I'm not willing to take my laptop to the areas where the bars are and leave it in the car.  I sure don't want to take it into one of the bars with me.  Having it with me during happy hour is one thing, but trying to keep track of it (or lugging it around on my person the whole time) when it's the late night crowd is another thing.

So I sat in my booth for over an hour, working on the novel.  I'm glad that I'm back to working on it and that it seems to be going so well.  After taking a break due to health issues, I was afraid that I had lost the thread of the story or my motivation.  Plus I had hit what I felt might be a bit of a lull in the plot (not that it's an action or suspense story to begin with), and I was concerned things were about to fizzle.  But this weekend, I felt like things started picking up again.  I'm more confident that I'll get a novel out of this yet.  Not sure how publishable it will be, but I'll at least get something worked out.  Besides, there's always the editing phase.

Of course, now that I'm writing (at least at times) at three different public venues:  Home Bar, the diner (which probably needs a code name), and Applebees (which I figure doesn't need a code name because there are hundreds of them).  I've decided I definitely like writing in public.  I think it's an atmosphere thing.  As weird as it probably sounds to most people, my house is just too quiet for me to write there most of the time.  Plus, at home, I have to deal with Hellcat's insistence that she needs attention, no matter what I'm doing at the time.  (I just can't bring myself to lock her out of the room I'm in.)  Oh sure, if I ignore her, she'll eventually settle down and nap, but then I start feeling guilty about ignoring her.

Sensual Sunday: Darrel makes a discovery

In today's installment of Sensual Sunday, I'm going to continue the scene with Liam and Darrel from last week.  I'm not entirely pleased with today's installment, but I can't decide how to best improve it either.  Feedback is welcome and encouraged.

Liam had just started getting lost in the movie when he felt the hand rub along the top of his thigh, slowly moving toward his waist.  He squirmed slightly as the caress excited him even more.  Darrel’s hand brushed against Liam’s erection, which was only held close to his leg by his jeans.

They also don't look like Liam
and Darrel.  Still sensual though!

The dark boy raised one eyebrow and grasped the shaft as well as he could through the denim.  “Again?” he asked, his voice filled with mock exasperation.

Liam blushed.  Darrel loved to tease him about the fact that he was almost always excited when the two were together.  “What can I say?  You know I like being near you.”

“I guess so,” Darrel said, then caressed the other boy’s member a couple times before letting it go and returning his hand to Liam’s thigh.  Liam sighed, both embarrassed and disappointed.  Darrel leaned over.  His warm breath blew against the other boy’s neck and ear as he whispered, “Don’t worry.  I promise I’ll give you the attention you need in a bit.”

Liam shivered and tried to will his aching erection to lessen for the time being.  He placed his own hand on top of Darrel’s and the couple interlaced their fingers.  Liam laid his head on Darrel’s shoulder and the other boy lightly squeezed his thigh as a show of affection.

Snowy Day Musings

It's been a quiet quiet couple days for me, really.  After running errands or going out every evening from Sunday through Wednesday, I decided that I'd stay home and relax on Thursday and Friday evenings.  Of course, that was definitely a good idea on Friday, given the winter weather we're having in my area right now.  It's not as bad here as what Matt and Brad are experiencing (over two feet, yikes!), but there was enough snow in the air and on the ground last night that it made sense to stay off the roads and inside where it was warm and dry as much as possible.  I've already been out this morning though.  The snow is still coming down, though not as bad as yesterday.  The roads are still messy, and I only drove about 20MPH(32km/h) in a 40MPH(64km/h) zone.  In all reality, I probably should've just stayed home this morning, but I had an emergency.  I was craving breakfast pizza.  (Yes, my priorities are a bit messed up, why do you ask?)

One is beautiful.
Millions are a nightmare.

Of course since I'm discussing winter weather, I feel obligated (or entitled) to tell my winter weather joke:

Why is a snowstorm like sex?  Because you don't know how long it last or how many inches you're going to get.

I know, that joke is practically an antique now.  I never claimed to have new or original materials.  That's probably why I gave up on stand-up comedy.

Anyway, back to bad weather and my life.  It was somewhat amusing at work yesterday afternoon.  I don't think anyone on my team (including our team leader and our supervising manager) got any work to speak of done for the last two hours.  We sat around chatting and watching the weather.  We kept teasing our supervising manager, asking us when he was going to send us home due to the bad weather.  I'm not sure why he didn't send us home, other than the fact that we're salary and he'd have to somehow justify paying us for the time we didn't work.  Well, time we weren't in the office.  As I said, it's not like we were actually working anyway.

After work, I had to drive about twenty minutes (well, more like thirty minutes, given the driving conditions) to my credit union to do some banking, then get groceries.  One of the things that drove me to distraction were the number of people who had parked their cars at the end of their driveways.  I assume they did it to try and keep the plows from plowing in the end of their driveways while working on the roads.  I get that, but it also meant some of their cars were almost sticking out into the road, forcing those of us driving to squeeze toward the middle of the road.  The last thing I want to do when the roads are slippery and messy is get even closer to the oncoming traffic!

Anyway, I'm looking forward to a mostly quiet day.  I figure it'll give me time to work on some writing.  After all, I have a Sensual Sunday post to work on for tomorrow.  I think I've decided to continue the story with Liam and Darrel.  I've also decided it'll probably get downright smutty.  Hope y'all enjoy it, or at least don't mind it.  Alas, none of you gave me any feedback on what you'd like to see.  :-P

Friday Thoughts: Infectious Passion

Passion is infectious.  Share whatever topics, hobbies, or other things get you excited and someone is bound to share in your excitement.  Even if they aren't normally interested in whatever makes you passionate.

My apologies to any readers who expected this to be primarily about sexual passion.  I can't be a hypersexual slut all the time.  (I need sleep too!)

A pleasant and productive Tuesday.

I had a pleasant evening on Tuesday.  I ended up going to Home Bar for dinner for the first time in months.  Their new bar menu looks pretty nice, though a bit limited in selection, in my opinion.  However, I had their signature burger and it was incredible.  The new cook knows how to make food, it seems.  (One of my problems with Home Bar after Management and his partner got out of the business was that the one person who was cooking tended to overcook everything to the point where it was dry and slightly on the tough side.)

I also spent some time there working on the novel, which is one of the things I love doing at Home Bar.  It's nice to sit there and talk to some of the regulars, then go back into my own little world where I create (or in some cases, chronicle) the activities of my characters.  It gives me something to do while still giving me a chance for socialization.  Though socialization wasn't a huge option last night.  It was mostly just me and the bar (and kitchen) staff.

After that, I came home and downloaded the tax software I use to do my income taxes.  I got my federal form completed and am quite happy with the refund I'm getting.  Unfortunately, I wasn't able to get my state return done yet.  It seems like the company is still working on the bundle for my state.  They say they'll have it done by the end of this week.  I hope so, as I have plans for that money already.  Plans I'd really like to put into action ASAP!

All in all, I felt I got a good bit accomplished Tuesday.  Which is good, as I didn't get nearly as much accomplished last night.

Get Personal With Me: Drink Preferences

What's your favorite drink?  Both alcoholic (for those who imbibe) and non-alcoholic.  That means you get to give two answers this week!

Tiring Weekend

I'm pretty tired right now.  Of course, it didn't help that I was slightly deprived of sleep on Saturday night.  I didn't leave Manly Bar until midnight, and then I went to a local diner to have a bit of food.  I didn't get home until after 1am and didn't crawl into bed until almost 2am.  Then Hellcat decided to wake me at around 7am, as she needed more food.   After all, she doesn't think she should have to change her schedule just because I decide to be a fool and stay out late.  I couldn't get back to sleep after that, so I was on the low end of my energy levels.  As such, I took it easy on Sunday.  Of course, I usually take it easy on Sundays. 

This year, I think I saw more of the Superbowl than I have in any previous year.  That's because I ended up going out to eat at a local restaurant with a bar that night.  The place was mostly empty except for the bar area, and they had the Superbowl on every television.  And while I spent most of my time staring at my laptop and working on my novel, I had to look up and take a break every now and then.  That meant staring in the general direction of the big television screen about twelve feet in front of me.  I was bound to see some football.  Not to mention commercials.  Heck, I even caught a few seconds of the halftime game.

From a writing perspective, it was a productive night.  I was able to get a lot of writing done, and the two Long Island ice teas I ordered certainly helped tear down any writer's block and silence the internal critic.  So that was good.

Last night, I had some business I had to take care of, so I spent most of the evening running around in my car.  That pretty much killed my plans to stay at home and try to get some extra rest.  Hopefully I'll find time to get some soon before I crash.  I just got healthy again and I'd like to stay that way.

Running with the (other?) bears

As I had planned to, I went to the local bear event at Manly bar Saturday night.  I had a pretty good time, though I felt awkward as I often do.  I only knew like two other people who were there, and I don't know them very well.  I did approach them and ask them about mutual friends and struck up a bit of small talk, but that was about it.  Then they pretty much went back to talking to other people.  That's probably why I was never very close to them.  They and I never really seem to click.

Imagine a bar full of guys like this.

I also had a bit of an oddity that I ran into a friend (or possibly former friend) of Rumor Queen while I was there.  She walked up to me and called me by name and I was a bit surprised at first.  She looked familiar, but I couldn't place how I'd know her.  Then she told me that she "was" (her use of "was" rather than "is" was what left me wondering if they had a falling out) a friend of Rumor Queen.  The conversation was brief, but quite pleasant.  She asked if I was having a good time and I said yes.  Then she continued on her way to the women's room.

The other curious point of the night was the fact that I almost got the impression that some guy spent a good portion of the night checking me out.  He was with a group of friends and I was standing about fifteen feet away, enjoying my first cocktail of the night.  (Well, not counting the two I had during happy hour much earlier in the evening.)  I looked back toward the group and noticed he seemed to be looking at me. The moment I looked, he'd look away.  He kept doing this for about fifteen or twenty minutes.  I wasn't sure if it was my imagination.  Alas, he never came over to say hi (or sent over one of his buddies to see if I'd be interested, if he's too shy to take the plunge himself).  And as I've mentioned before, I'm just ready to let the other guy make the first move right now.  It's a shame, as he was pretty cute.  I'm guessing he was between ten and fifteen years my junior.

Overall, it was okay.  I'm hoping more people that I know will be there next time.

Sensual Sunday: Meet Liam and Darrel

Totally not what Liam and Darrel look
like in my head.  But definitely sensual.

I've decided to try a new thing here on G(WT)P for Sundays.  I'm going to start a new series called Sensual Sunday (or perhaps it should be Smutty Sundays) in which I share a bit of my writing that's...of an intimate nature...

It occurred to me that I've talked a bit about my writing here, but I have never shared any of it.  I don't link to my writing portfolios here because they're under my real name and I want to maintain pseudo-anonymity.  I think that's a shame, because I think some of my readers might enjoy my writing.  (After all, one of my most viewed posts of all times is this one.)

So I've decided that on Sundays, I will post something that I wrote specifically for this site.  I haven't worked out the details.  I may (and I'm leaning toward this) continue the story that I'm starting with today's post about Liam and Darrel^[1].  I also haven't decided whether I'm going to keep it PG-13 or get all "classier version of Letters to Penthouse" on the series^[2].  But I figure no matter what, it should be an interesting series, or not.

So without any further ado, please enjoy today's installment of Sensual Sunday:

Liam sat next to Darrel on the futon in the other boy’s dorm room.  He was only half watching the movie that was playing on the fifteen inch television.  He really wasn’t into science fiction movies like Darrel was.  Besides, he was distracted by being so close to the other guy.  He could feel Darrel’s warmth against him.  Occasionally, one of them would shift and knees or thighs would brush against each other.  Liam would blush at the moment’s contact.

He turned to stare at the other boy, admiring his dark skin and youthful face.  Darrel kept his hair in a buzz cut, which Liam liked in contrast to his own brown curls.  He reached up and ran his thumb along Darrel’s cheek, noting that the other boy must not have shaved this morning as he felt the slightest hint of stubble.  Darrel turned his head slightly to look at Liam, amusement showing in his eyes.  Liam dropped his hand as blood flooded his cheeks.

Darrel’s smile broadened slightly before he leaned his head toward Liam.  Their lips met and Darrel rewarded Liam with a tender yet firm kiss.  Liam brought both hands to the other boy’s face this time, enjoying the feel of Darrel’s skin on his palms and fingers.  He felt his pulse quicken slightly.

Darrel broke off the kiss and nodded toward the television.  Liam nodded and tried to focus on the action on the screen.  He sighed softly as the other boy rested a hand on his thigh, the fingers wrapping around to the inner thigh.  He rested his head on Darrel’s shoulders, trying to enjoy the movie as much as he enjoyed the physical contact.

---

^[1]You can tell Liam and Darrel are fictional characters because they don't have code names.

^[2]Hint:  Now would be a good time to speak up if you have a preference, dear readers.

Gotta Get Out

Well, if I still needed a sign that my health really was improving, I got it last night.  At around 9pm, I was going stir crazy.  I was tired of sitting at home by myself and chatting online.  I wanted to get out and hang out with other people.  I wanted to mingle.  I wanted to flirt.  And getting lucky wouldn't have hurt my feelings, either^[1].

In the long run, I decided to stay home, though.  I'm planning to go out to Manly Bar tonight for the bear event they have planned.  Since going out two nights in the same weekend totally drains me and I'm already just starting to get back to feeling like I have energy, I chose to do the responsible, self-care oriented thing instead.

TMI Time!  B!  Definitely B!

I've started going to Manly Bar a bit more.  As much as I like Home Bar -- and I do try to go there from time to time to see some of my favorite bartenders and other friends I have there -- the crowd at Manly Bar is somewhat more my style.  Plus, as they tend to attract younger crowd, Home Bar tends to be filled with all kinds of drama and other immaturity.  I might actually be one of the younger guys^[2] at Manly Bar, in comparison.

Also, Management and his partner got out of the restaurant business, which is quite sad.  That means that the upstairs dining room is no longer open at Home Bar. The kitchen is still open and serves bar food downstairs.  But bar food is just bar food, so it doesn't have quite the same draw.  Plus it means I can no longer go in for a weekend dinner and sit at a quiet table and work on my writing.  Though I have worked on my writing during happy hour on weekdays at the bar before.  I may still do that.

At any rate, it means that I'm re-evaluating just how much time I spend at Home Bar and whether I might be better served by finding a new "regular" hang-out spot.  I may think about trying a coffee shop again.  It would certainly be good from a writing standpoint, but I don't do well at meeting new people at coffee shops.

---

^[1]Hey, I'm a guy with needs.  And I haven't done anything since Christmas day, and that time wasn't entirely satisfying for me, either.

^[2]Some day, I may do a whiny post about the conflict between being attracted to younger guys and the frustration I feel with younger guys' antics.  The dynamic is really quite messed up.